Why Do You Play Games in Therapy?

It's one of the most common questions parents ask when their child starts play therapy: "They just play games in there — is that actually doing anything?"

It's a fair question. From the outside, a therapy session that involves building with blocks, playing a board game, or acting out scenarios with puppets might not look much like the talking-based therapy most adults are familiar with. But there's a great deal happening beneath the surface — and understanding it can help you appreciate just how powerful play really is.

Play Is the Language of Children

Adults process their experiences primarily through language. When something difficult happens, we talk about it — with friends, with partners, with therapists. We put words to our feelings, tell the story of what happened, and work through it verbally.

Children don't yet have that capacity. Their brains are still developing the neural pathways that connect experience to language. When something is confusing, scary, or overwhelming, a child often can't tell you about it — not because they're being difficult or secretive, but because they genuinely don't have the words.

What they do have is play.

Play is the natural language of childhood. It's how children make sense of their world, process their experiences, express their feelings, and work through what's troubling them. When a child plays out a scenario where a small animal is lost and then found, or where a powerful figure is defeated by a small one, they may be processing something very real — even if they couldn't tell you what it is.

What Happens in Play Therapy

In play therapy, the therapist creates a safe, consistent space where a child can play freely and expressively. The therapist is trained to observe the themes, patterns, and emotions that emerge in play — and to respond in ways that help the child feel seen, understood, and safe.

This might look like:

• Sandtray work, where a child creates scenes using miniature figures in a tray of sand — a powerful way to externalise inner experiences
• Art and creative expression, which allows feelings to be expressed without words
• Storytelling and puppetry, which give children a safe distance from which to explore difficult themes
• Board games and structured play, which can reveal how a child handles frustration, competition, winning, and losing — and provide opportunities to practise new responses
• Imaginative play, where children take on roles and act out scenarios that reflect their inner world

The therapist isn't just watching passively. They're tracking what's happening, reflecting back what they observe, and gently facilitating the child's process.

Why Games Specifically?

Games are particularly useful in therapy for several reasons.

They Create a Safe Container

A game has rules, a beginning, and an end. For children who feel anxious or out of control in their daily lives, this structure can be genuinely regulating. The predictability of a game creates safety.

They Reveal Patterns

How a child plays a game tells a therapist a great deal. Does the child need to win at all costs? Do they give up the moment things get difficult? Do they cheat — and if so, what does that reveal about their relationship with fairness or power? Do they become dysregulated when they lose? All of this is information.

They Provide Opportunities for Growth

Games create natural moments to practise skills that may be difficult for a child — tolerating frustration, managing disappointment, taking turns, asking for help, celebrating someone else's success. The therapist can gently support the child through these moments in real time.

They Build the Relationship

Perhaps most importantly, playing together builds connection. A therapist who gets down on the floor and genuinely engages with a child in play is communicating something powerful: I am here with you. I am interested in you. You matter.

That relationship — built partly through play — is one of the most healing things therapy has to offer.

What Parents Can Do

Understanding the purpose of play in therapy can help you support your child's process at home. A few things that can make a difference:

Trust the process. Progress in play therapy is often gradual and not always visible. Changes may show up as subtle shifts in behaviour, mood, or emotional regulation before they become obvious.

Don't interrogate after sessions. It's natural to want to know what happened, but asking "What did you do today?" or "What did you talk about?" can put pressure on a child and undermine the safety of the therapeutic space. Let your child share what they want to share, when they want to share it.

Stay in communication with the therapist. Your observations at home are valuable. Share what you're noticing — both the challenges and the small victories.

Play at home. You don't need to be a therapist to use play therapeutically. Simply making time for unstructured, child-led play — where your child gets to choose the activity and you follow their lead — is one of the most connecting things you can do.

A Final Word

The next time you wonder whether playing games in therapy is "really doing anything," remember: for a child, play is not a break from the serious work. Play is the serious work.

It's how children communicate what they can't yet say, process what they can't yet understand, and heal in ways that talking alone can't always reach. In the hands of a skilled play therapist, a simple game of Jenga or a sandtray scene can open doors that might otherwise stay closed for years.

Play is powerful. And your child's therapist knows exactly how to use it.